Monday, May 01, 2006
The End Of More Than One Era
I gave up the keys to my place today and all of a sudden – it just hit me. I was so busy micromanaging everything that I nearly missed the fact that a lot of things in my life have come or will be coming to an end. For example:
I moved to BC in April of 2003 and now I’m leaving for another continent;
I lived almost three years in my place in Burnaby and now I’ve moved out;
I spent six semesters at BCIT and now I’ll never need to be on campus again.
… and, my keys are lighter. I know that’s so minor, but doesn’t matter – I still noticed.
Then, I had a small freak-out.
For me, it’s all in the details (maybe that’s why I enjoy proofing). But everything I felt today made me wonder just how far my thought process really goes. Have I become so micro that I’ve strayed from what’s really important? Have I gotten lost in the details? And if so, just how big – or small – of a picture am I really seeing?
I’m leaving in five days. I know it’s the right thing for me to do at this point in my life, for so many reasons; I've always wanted to travel and I love my guy. But it still makes me sad to say goodbye to the things that, in the past few years I've spent here, I’ve really grown to know, appreciate and love.
Some things will still be here when I return: my family, my friends, my car (if it doesn’t die on my brother in law, of course). But there’s other things I know will never be the same – things I know I’ll never be able to get back.
Life goes on. Things change, and for good reason. We often think that we can't control our own destinies but we, as human beings, really do have control. Quite frankly, I think the choices we make when dealing with change determines what the outcomes will be like.
I ain't no expert, but from my experience I believe that the most important thing is to remain honest. With others? Yes. But especially with ourselves ... remembering to always ask why we choose the paths we do, and to never lose sight of the big picture, however difficult that may be.
Change can be quick and sudden or slow and creeping but if we remain truly honest with ourselves and genuinely aware of our intentions – that’s got to be a good start. As Bishop put it: “Take time to listen to your soul and spirit and it will guide your path during your search.” Amen, brother.
I may be freaked out now, but I know it’ll soon be okay.
I gave up the keys to my place today and all of a sudden – it just hit me. I was so busy micromanaging everything that I nearly missed the fact that a lot of things in my life have come or will be coming to an end. For example:
I moved to BC in April of 2003 and now I’m leaving for another continent;
I lived almost three years in my place in Burnaby and now I’ve moved out;
I spent six semesters at BCIT and now I’ll never need to be on campus again.
… and, my keys are lighter. I know that’s so minor, but doesn’t matter – I still noticed.
Then, I had a small freak-out.
For me, it’s all in the details (maybe that’s why I enjoy proofing). But everything I felt today made me wonder just how far my thought process really goes. Have I become so micro that I’ve strayed from what’s really important? Have I gotten lost in the details? And if so, just how big – or small – of a picture am I really seeing?
I’m leaving in five days. I know it’s the right thing for me to do at this point in my life, for so many reasons; I've always wanted to travel and I love my guy. But it still makes me sad to say goodbye to the things that, in the past few years I've spent here, I’ve really grown to know, appreciate and love.Some things will still be here when I return: my family, my friends, my car (if it doesn’t die on my brother in law, of course). But there’s other things I know will never be the same – things I know I’ll never be able to get back.
Life goes on. Things change, and for good reason. We often think that we can't control our own destinies but we, as human beings, really do have control. Quite frankly, I think the choices we make when dealing with change determines what the outcomes will be like.
I ain't no expert, but from my experience I believe that the most important thing is to remain honest. With others? Yes. But especially with ourselves ... remembering to always ask why we choose the paths we do, and to never lose sight of the big picture, however difficult that may be.
Change can be quick and sudden or slow and creeping but if we remain truly honest with ourselves and genuinely aware of our intentions – that’s got to be a good start. As Bishop put it: “Take time to listen to your soul and spirit and it will guide your path during your search.” Amen, brother.
I may be freaked out now, but I know it’ll soon be okay.
# posted by @anatingor @ Monday, May 01, 2006 
Comments:
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I hear vodka helps with the freakouts.
London, baby, tonight - see you at the airport. I leave from Gate D71.
London, baby, tonight - see you at the airport. I leave from Gate D71.
# posted by 
: Friday, May 05, 2006
: Friday, May 05, 2006
"Take time to listen to your soul and spirit and it will guide your path during your search."
I love it! You go girl! Take care yourself and best wishes to you, Angie.
keep in touch!
I love it! You go girl! Take care yourself and best wishes to you, Angie.
keep in touch!
Ah, the words of Bishop. Maybe I really should look at going back to church if his belief creates inspiration like that!
Thanks Yu-Hao! It's great to see you on the blog ... and I will most definitely keep in touch!
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Thanks Yu-Hao! It's great to see you on the blog ... and I will most definitely keep in touch!
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